How to deal with people with mental disorders is very tricky. On the one hand, you don’t want to hurt their volatile feelings.
On the other hand, you are confused about the right way to behave. This will be even more challenging when the person who has to deal with is a partner with a mental disorder.
Living with a partner with a mental disorder is indeed a challenge, for example in the case of depression. Misunderstandings are prone to occur, so friction in your relationship often arises.
More importantly, the feelings of a depressed partner must have been so raging. He doesn’t need additional conflict with you. It is important for you to know how to deal with people with mental disorders. Here are some of them:
1. Never Force
It’s natural for you to ask your partner to tell you what’s going on or how you’re feeling.
However, forcing someone who is depressed will only make him more stressed and uncomfortable.
When the time comes, it’s possible that they will open themselves up to you. Not everyone can immediately tell what they feel or want. Especially for couples with mental disorders.
2. Keep Showing Reasonable Concern
Although forcing to find out the condition of your partner is not recommended, it does not mean you are indifferent.
Continue to show you care by asking questions, such as saying “What’s wrong?” as well as “How do you feel?”.
If he refuses to speak because he is frantic, don’t ask again. Instead, say “If you need help, just say so.”
Avoid saying “Come on, tell me what happened. I can’t understand if you don’t tell me.”
The second sentence is coercive and will only add to the burden felt by the couple.
Related Article: Types of Mental Disorders You Need to Know
3. Just listen, you don’t have to give advice
The wrong thing that many people often do is give advice or judgmental sentences. In fact, scold or blame the person who is telling the problem.
Not everyone needs it, especially people with mental disorders such as depression. They just want to be heard, so stop being a ‘therapist’.
There’s no need to judge if he doesn’t ask you questions. Giving wrong advice can actually have a bad impact on your partner and is prone to causing them to get worse.
This step is quite difficult. Sometimes you feel confused to face your partner alone. However, showing confusion even saying it explicitly would only make him feel guilty.
If the guilt arises, then it will be more closed and can be fatal.
If he feels that being open or showing his dark side makes those around him uncomfortable, he’ll choose to keep it to himself.
5. Invite your partner to be active and show you need them
Relapse of depressive symptoms usually occurs when there are not many positive activities undertaken. For that, you can invite him to do various activities.
For example, his favorite sport, watching skits, eating good food, participating in social activities, teaching him to play a musical instrument, and so on.
There is a special trick to make him want to follow the agenda and feel that he is also needed by you.
Say “Would you like to accompany me to event X?” or “Could you accompany me shopping?” That way, he feels that he not only needs someone but you too.
6. Avoid Being Overly Sensitive
There are times when a partner with a mental disorder withdraws and is reluctant to share it with anyone, including you.
Understand that he has difficulty regulating his feelings and attitudes. Avoid being take it personally and feel that your partner hates you.
It’s natural to feel inadequate or useless when a mentally challenged partner doesn’t seem to need you. This is not the true picture, in fact quite the opposite.
He really needs your support and presence, but not in the same way as most people.
7. Give Advice for Visiting Professionals
The last way to deal with a partner with a mental disorder is to open up their partner’s awareness when he or she already needs professional treatment.
Your partner may already need assistance when the mental disorder they experience is severe. One of the signs is the emergence of thoughts of ending one’s life (suicide).
Of course, this advice cannot be given without measuring the situation and conditions. Wrong, you make him feel offended.
Worse still, he may feel like you don’t care anymore and don’t want to help him anymore by delegating the matter to an expert.
Therefore, giving this advice should be done slowly. You can start by telling the experiences of other people who feel helped by the assistance of a psychologist or psychiatrist.
Next time, you gently ask him about his desire to try to see a professional.
If necessary, make sure that you will always try to accompany him on every visit to a professional.
These are some of the ways you can rely on dealing with people with mental disorders. You really have to be careful how you act, in order to take care of his feelings and help him recover.
Having a partner with a mental disorder is not an easy condition. But if you feel that this relationship is worth fighting for, then give totality to it.